Our present situation is training for further service to God.



Prayer is not a matter of coming to God with our wish list and pleading with
Him to give us what we ask for; prayer is first and foremost the experience
of being in the presence of God.



Sometimes we wonder, What did I do to deserve this? or Why did God have to
do this to me? Here is a wonderful explanation! A daughter is telling her
Mother how everything is going wrong, she's failing algebra, her boyfriend
broke up with her and her best friend is moving away.

Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would
like a snack, and the daughter says, Absolutely Mom, I love your cake.

Here, have some cooking oil, her Mother offers. Yuck says her daughter.

How about a couple raw eggs? Gross, Mom!

Would you like some flour then? Or maybe baking soda? Mom, those are all
yucky!

To which the mother replies: Yes, all those things seem bad all by
themselves. But when they are put together in the right

way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake!

God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through
such bad and difficult times. But God knows that when He puts these things
all in His order, they always work for good! We just have to trust Him and,
eventually, they will all make something wonderful!

God is crazy about you. He sends you flowers every Spring and a sunrise
every morning.

Whenever you want to talk, He'll listen. He can live anywhere in the
universe but He chose your heart.



Kids were asked questions about the Old and New Testaments. The following
statements about the Bible were written by children. They have not been
retouched or corrected. Incorrect spelling has been left in.

1. In the first book of the Bible, Guinessis. God got tired of creating the
world so He took the Sabbath off.

2. Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. Noah's! wife was Joan of
Ark. Noah built and ark and the animals came on in pears.

3. Lots wife was a pillar of salt during the day, but a ball of fire during
the night.

4. The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with
unsympathetic Genitals.

5. Sampson was a strongman who let himself be led astray by a Jezebel like
Delilan.

6. Samson slayed the Philitins with the axe of the Apostles.

7. Moses led the Jews to the Red Sea where they made unleavened bread which
is bread without any ingredients.

8. The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert. Afterwards, Moses went up
to Mount Cyanide to get the Ten Commandments.

9. The First Commandments was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.

10. The Seventh Commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.

11. Moses died before he ever reached Canada. Then Joshua LED THE Hebrews in
the battle of Geritol.

12. The greatest Miricle in the Bible is when Joshua told his son to stand
still and he obeyed him.

13. David was a Hebrew king who was skilled at playing the liar. He fought
the Finkelsteins, a race of people who lived in Biblical times.

14. Solomon, one of Davids sons, had 300 wives and 700 Porchpines!

15. When Mary heard she was the mother of Jesus, she sang the Magna Carta.

16. When the three wise guys from the east side arrived they found Jesus in
the mangaer.

17. Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.

18. St. John the blacksmith dumped water on his head.

19. Jesus enunciated the golden rule, which says to do unto others before
they do one to you. He also explained a man doth not live by sweat alone.

20. It was a miricle when Jesus rose from the dead and managed to get the
tombstone off the entrance.

21. The people who followed the Lord were called the 12 Decibles.

22. The Epistels were the wives of the Apostles.

23. One of the Oppossums was St. Matthew who was also a taximan.

24. St. Paul cavorted to Christiantty, he preached holy acrimony which is
another name for marriage.

25. Christians have only one spouse. This is called monntomy.

A.S.A.P.
Always Say A Prayer