How to Turn Nice Men Off

One of the biggest issues women have with men is "Why didn't he call back?"
We know why insensitive men don't call back, they're creeps. But what about
men who seem too nice to be that rude? After talking to a lot of men about this
problem, this is what it boils down to:

1. She said too much. Men tell me that many women go into way too much
detail about their past relationships, especially of a sexual nature. Men don't
want to hear about everything.

2. She talked about all the bad things every man ever did to her...and she
blames me. Men hate it when a woman blames them for what some jerk before them
did to her. It's like they're guilty until proven innocent.

3. She's angry at men. She's got a chip on her shoulder about men and
carries a bit of anger toward all men...simply because they're men. This is a
variation on #2 but it's about men in general, rather than specific men and
incidences. Even worse, because of her anger toward men she can find flaw in
every
new man. Since no man is ever good enough, why would a nice man even try?

4. She lacks some or all of the qualities he's looking for. Most any woman's
list of expectations regarding men, marriage, and relationships is pretty
long. Consequently, most women settle for a man that lacks some of the
qualities she was looking for. A man's list is very short. For example, if a
man's
list of what he's looking for in that special woman is four items long, if one
item is missing, that's one/quarter of what he needs. If its missing, he's
gone...without an explanation.

5. She has sex too soon. Yes, most men want to get a woman into bed as soon
as possible. But, if a woman he's really interested in has sex with him too
soon, he quits calling because he figures if she did it with him so easily, she
probably did with others, equally soon in the relationship. It's a double
standard, of course, but I'm just reporting the news. And ladies, don't say, "I
don't usually have sex so soon." He won't believe it, even if it's true.
He's heard it before. He wants to think you're kind of pure, and maybe only had
sex with the few men you were truly in love with. Wait until you think this
man could become Mr. Right. He'll respect your desire to wait. If not, isn't
it nice to find out now.

Okay, you haven't done any of those things but he still doesn't call back.
Again, setting aside that he isn't an insensitive creep, what's the deal? Here
are the two reasons that it boils down to: He's not ready to get involved,
and/or...you're not the right one. Pretty simple. You may be great, perfect,
actually, for another guy, just not this guy. It reflects nothing bad on you,
it's just that his list of requirements is very short compared to yours. Maybe
five or six items. If only one of those items is missing, that's a pretty
big percentage of the package he's looking for. What you need to learn to do is
say, "Next."




HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Be who you are and say what you feel,
because those who mind don't matter,
and those who matter don't mind.
- Dr. Suess


Yahoo! Groups: End_Verbal_Abuse Group Leader
_http://groups.yahoo.com/group/End_Verbal_Abuse_
(http://groups.yahoo.com/group/End_Verbal_Abuse)

Yahoo! Groups: CoDependents Group Leader
_http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Codependents_
(http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Codependents)





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