Hi everyone.
I've been getting normal paps for years and years, and in February 05
I had a pap that said ASCUS, plus a second test that was positive for
High Risk onocogenic HPV. I went through a colposcopy and biopsy last
week, which showed that I have HSIL, CIN II. The Doctor recommended I
get a LEEP.

Needless to say, I'm freaked out. I have two kids, ages 9 and 5 and
being 34 I wasn't quite ready to say "okay, I guess this is it for
having kids." I know they say that side effects of scar tissue and
infertility aren't in all cases, but still...I'm sure you all
understand the feeling of "if it can happen, it will probably happen
to me." Then I read all the stuff that says the patient's attitude
plays a large role in recovery. And, I know I don't have "offical"
cancer yet. It's just so hard. Also, when I got the ASCUS diagnosis
my Doc said "prob would be cancer in 5-10 yrs if we didn't do
anything, so we're just going to take care of it." Funny, the next
Doc
that did my biopsy said the same thing when she was telling me I had
CIN II. I have a very deep gut feeling that this is NOT over...

I guess I just need to whine into cyberworld and see if anyone shares
my worries. I don't want to get cancer, but already living a pretty
healthy, organic foods, vitamin filled life, I have no idea what to
do
besides reduce stress. And, I'm plenty stressed out!

Argh.
Jen