Center of Attention
Newsletter of CHADD of Northern California
Also at: http://www.chaddnorcal.org/newsletter
25 November 2001

CHADD Works to Improve the Lives of People with
Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder through Education, Advocacy,
and Support

===== In This Issue =====

About the Newsletter
Feature Article: Talking to Traumatized Kids
This Week: Summary of the National Conference
Please Tell Us
Calendar of Events

===== About the Newsletter =====

The Center of Attention is CHADD of Northern California's bi-weekly
newsletter. The newsletter is designed to keep you up to date with
CHADD of Northern California's activities and updates in the field.
It's a step toward bringing the members closer together.

===== Feature Article ======

Source: Barbara Day, Special Education Guide
From: SpecialEd.Guide@...

This article is being published in our newsletter with permission
from Barbara Day. You can visit her website at "SpecialEd.about.com."

Talking to Traumatized Kids

How do you explain a tragedy to a child who has special needs?

Each of us is feeling the impact of what happened on September 11,
2001 in our own way. We are only now beginning to catch a glimpse of
the horror that still has not been completely revealed. But, despite
our shock and disbelief, we must take care of our children now.

"Young children may be disturbed by witnessing scenes of destruction
on television or by listening in on adult conversations," says
Suzanne Smith-Sharp, a Parent Consultant/Advocate at The Center for
Family & Infant Interaction in Denver, Colorado. Smith-Sharp adds
that parents can expect come changes in behavior. "It may not be
unusual if some young children react by being more clinging, seeming
a bit more concerned, or having difficulty at bedtime," she says.

The same is true for older children who are developmentally delayed,
have emotional disorders, or who have other conditions that make it
hard for them to come to grips with what has happened. Some children
may react by acting out more; others may become more withdrawn.

Parents must consider the age and developmental level of their
children as they deal with news reports of death and terror.
"Although it might be important to allow older children to
participate in viewing and talking about the news, it might be wise
to limit young children's exposure to TV news," said Smith-Sharp.
Again, children with developmental delays can be expected to react
differently than their near-age siblings.

Dr. Steven Richfield is a child psychologist in Plymouth Meeting, PA.
He reminds parents that they should talk with their children in terms
that he or she can understand. "As a general rule, elementary-aged
kids perceive life in narrower terms, preferring to focus on the
immediate moments rather than the past or future. Thus the youngsters
will have less need to talk and ask questions," explains Dr.
Richfield. "In contrast, middle schoolers and older teens are likely
to pursue a deeper understanding of the meanings and implications
since their cognitive abilities thirst for answers to such horrific
acts of violence."

Talk to your kids. Listen to what they are saying - and to what they
do not say. "A normally anxious and reflective 8 year old may need to
process these events with parents more thoroughly than a detached and
emotionally flat adolescent," says Dr. Richfield.

Each of us, regardless of age, diagnosis or IQ, will have to deal
with our own reaction to the tragedy. But it is the children who will
especially need to find ways to see and believe that all life has
meaning, even now when it seems that life is so insignificant to
those responsible for the tragedy.

Finally, never, never underestimate the power of hearing words like
"No matter what ever happens--I'll be there for you," and other
reassurances.

And if you can't think of anything else to say, never underestimate
the power of simply saying "I love you."

Hope all is well with your loved ones...

Barb

======== This Week ==========

Below is a summary of the CHADD Thirteenth Annual Conference on
Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder from an attendees' point of
view. It has been edited and is being published with her kind
permission.

The following was received from Jeannette Peters, a member of CHADD
of Northern California from Sonoma.

The 13th International Conference was a lot like that other major
attraction in Anaheim, really big, really busy, and playing to
several different audiences all at once. The Conference Book, not a
booklet, but a Book, had 279 pages, of Sessions and Presentations for
ten different Conference Tracks for Adults, Parents, Educators, Legal
Advocacy, Health Care, Spanish, etc.

I, for instance, learned that I am no longer The Worlds Worst Dancer.
It took three women pulling me onto the dance floor at the Hawaiian
Poolside Reception to help me learn that. (It was billed as the
hottest party in Anaheim, and it was, for a few minutes for me
anyway.) Then it took a sadly empty and under-attended presentation
on AD/HD and the sub-types of Learning Disabilities in Mathematics
(MLD) to explain how that could happen.

Dr. Amen's new book Healing ADD - The Breakthrough Program That
Allows You to See and Heal the 6 Types of ADD has a section on diet
and nutrition. His theme is Food is Medicine. Jeannette Peters
brought these nuggets home from Dr. Amen at the Conference:

Taking dexedrine or Adderall with an acidic drink like orange juice
may reduce its effectiveness.

Taking stimulant medication with a high protein meal will extend its
effectiveness.

Chronic stress de-activates the effectiveness of medication.

Vicodin (a narcotic pain medication that is widely prescribed) slows
down brain function and makes ADD worse.

More Cogitations on the CHADD Conference, from a talk "Can your
Marriage Survive ADHD?"

ADD causes problems in relationships -- but not always the problems
you think. When 67 couples wherein one spouse has ADHD and one does
not, filled out a "Marital Impact Checklist" which rated ADHD
behaviors by how much they made the non ADHD spouse feel unloved, the
results were surprising. The top 10 items that the ADHD spouse picked
didn't always match the top 10 items the non-ADHD spouse picked.

The top 10 behaviors the ADHD spouses THOUGHT made their non-ADHD
partners feel unloved:

1) Tolerates too much and then blows up inconsistently.
2) Has trouble dealing with frustration.
3) Doesn't remember being told things.
4) Says things without thinking.
5) Tries to do too much in a short time.
6) Under-estimates the time needed to complete a task.
7) Has trouble getting started on a task.
8) Takes out frustration on spouse.
9) Changes plans in midstream.
10) Doesn't finish household tasks.

The top 10 behaviors that REALLY made the non-ADHD partners feel unloved:

1) Doesn't remember being told things.
2) Says things without thinking.
3) Leaves a mess after self.
4) Has trouble dealing with frustration.
5) Under-estimates the time needed to complete a task.
6) Doesn't finish household projects.
7) Has trouble getting started on a task.
8) Can't get things done unless there is an absolute deadline.
9) Takes out frustrations on spouse.
10) Doesn't plan ahead.


===== Please Tell Us! =====

We thank members for their responses to the Newsletter. Any comments,
suggestions, or criticisms will be greatly appreciated. Please
continue to help us make this newsletter more beneficial to you all.

We also invite readers to share their experiences with us and other
members. Please feel free to write to us about anything that you
would like to see published.

You can e-mail your comments to us at CHADD_Dimples@....
Simply replying to this e-mail will also send your message to the
right place.

======== Calendar of Events ==========

11/28/2001, Wed. 9-10:30am - Marin
Support Group for Parents of Children / Teens with ADHD, Share your
concerns with a parent who really understands.
10 Glen Drive, Mill Valley - Contact: Mary Jo Sorensen: 415-388-8817
============================
11/28/2001, Wed. 7:15 p.m. - 9:30 p.m. - Santa Clara
Kitty Petty ADD/LD Institute Meeting, ADHD and BiPolar Spectrum
Disorders - Matthew Stubblefield, MD
Friends Meeting House, Palo Alto - Contact: Kitty Petty ADD/LD
Institute: 650-329-9443
============================
11/29/2001, Thu. 6-8:00 PM PST - Online
Pete and Pam Wright - Advocating for Your Child,
CHADD Online Chat, Internet - Contact: Message Line: 510-291-2950
============================
12/1/2001, Sat. 9:00a.m.-12:00p.m - Santa Clara
Dr. Robert Sapolsky - "Stress: Memory, Learned Helplessness, Anxiety
in Learning and Dyslexia", Sponsored by the International Dyslexia
Association & the Schwab Foundation for Learning
Stanford SLAC, Palo Alto - Contact: International Dyslexia
Association: 650-328-7667 or visit www.interdys.org
============================
12/4/2001, Tues. 6-8:00 PM PST - Online
Ross Greene - Explosive Children,
CHADD Online Chat, Internet - Contact: Message Line: 510-291-2950
============================
12/5/2001, Wed. 7-9 pm - Contra Costa
Walnut Creek Adult Topical Meeting - Coping with Stress, Ongoing,
confidential support groups for Adults with ADHD
Kaiser Mental Health, Walnut Creek - Contact: Donna Love: 925-687-4324
============================
12/5/2001, Wed. 7:30pm - San Francisco
Women's ADD Support Group, Please Call Lynn to confirm times and
locations before attending.
CPMC Davies Campus, San Francisco - Contact: Lynn: 415-621-1078
============================
12/11/2001, Tues. 7-9pm - Marin
Making the Holidays More to Your Liking!! - Michael Vurek, LCSW,
Learn some ways for making the holidays good for you rather than
being hijacked by strong emotions. Also enjoy holiday treats at our
annual party!!! Bring something to share, if you wish. Michael has a
private practice in Kentfield and specializes in groups and
cognitive-behavioral therapy. A new 10 week group is forming.
415-451-7455.
Town Center Corte Madera Community Room, Corte Madera - Contact:
Beverlee: 415-789-9464
============================
12/12/2001, Wed. 7 - 9 pm - Alameda
Tri-Valley Parent Support Meeting,
Thomas J. Hart Middle School, Pleasanton - Contact: JoAnn Matone: 925-484-2173
============================
12/18/2001, Tues. 7-9pm - Marin
Drop in Support Group, for Adults and Teens with ADHD and Significant Others
Marin Community Mental Health, Greenbrae - Contact: Beverlee: 415-789-9464
============================
12/26/2001, Wed. 7:15 p.m. - 9:30 p.m. - Santa Clara
Kitty Petty ADD/LD Institute Meeting, Discussion of and sharing
successful ADHD/LD strategies and coping skills with other like
ADDults. Plus holiday refreshments.
Friends Meeting House, Palo Alto - Contact: Kitty Petty ADD/LD
Institute: 650-329-9443
============================