You're both exactly right, of course; finding one's way through the
thicket of fad cures is exhausting, physically and emotionally; and
rancourus needs a well-earned hug :)

I am the mom of a 4yo son with autism, and I do devote myself, pretty
much full-time, to tracking down and implementing various ways to
help him get better. It ain't easy, but my rationale is that every
ounce of improvement we can achieve while he's little, will pay us
back in spades, later in life when his brain will become
less "plastic" and able to mend itself. I think it's completely
appropriate to be skeptical of wild claims and theories, and to be
protective of our kids' time and health, AND to be cognizant of our
own feelings and limitations, as you describe. All those feelings are
natural and inevitable, and imo the more you cope with them in real-
time, the less emotional "interest" you'll owe later on unprocessed
stress and grief.

We are relatively new to chelation; we've just finished the fourth
round, DMSA only. Before that my son's had a little over a year of 40
hours/week ABA, almost two years of 90 minutes/week individual speech
therapy, and about a year on the GF/CF diet. All those things have
helped (or we wouldn't have stuck with them) but I can say chelation
has already helped MARKEDLY in a way nothing else can touch. For the
first time in his life, he's actually curious; he notices things,
points out things, and while he's not quite ready to ask questions
yet, he now posits his own explanations for things he sees.
(F'rinstance, yesterday morning he went into the back yard early and
his lawn chair was still wet; he said "Chair is all wet" and then,
after a pause, with an accusing glance over at me, "Yuck. Pee goes in
the potty!") His thinking and awareness and engagement with the world
are qualitatively better than they have EVER been before, and in my
mind that's huge. We can now have a three-or-four exchange
conversation with him on subjects other than his own immediate
desires; he talks all day long, not always but often purposefully.

Hope this is of use in your decision-making. Good luck to you and
your boy.

Cathy

--- In Autism-Mercury@y..., Moria Merriweather <moriam@e...> wrote:
> dear rancourus@y..., and dear listmates,
>
> I plan to answer the issues regarding "cure" and whether this
> chelation thing helps, and so on. HOWEVER, as I read your note,
> what strikes me most strongly is your heartfelt request for
> some empathy and understanding about how tired you are of --well--
> all the things you mention. Which I cannot provide. I am
> not the parent of an ASD kid. It's a place where I can't
> help. (But you definitly have what empathy I *can* give---
> for example, I've been tired, and I've been dicouraged,
> and I've been wary.)
>
> So, I hope some of my listmates will give you some
> of the "amen" you are looking for, and then I'll be glad to
> give you some useful and hopeful info about whether chelation
> "works" or not.
>
> best,
> Moria
>
>
>
>
> At 03:51 AM 9/10/2001 -0000, you wrote:
> >It seems like this mercury thing is getting more and more popular.
So
> >many people I run into on the internet are rushing for testing,
doing
> >chelation and so on. Now I saw a message at this other place
talking
> >about dangerous mercury leaching from dental amalgams -
> >http://www.autisms.org/forum/topic.asp?ARCHIVE=&TOPIC_ID=7 .
Recently
> >our son's symptoms got worse and this was right around the time he
> >got a bunch of fillings so I'm wondering if we are poisoning him
at
> >the same time we are trying to help him!
> >
> >I'm always skeptical of the latest greatest things especially when
> >people herald it as a "cure". Still this coincidence has me
concerned
> >enough that I'd like to get our son tested for mercury. But how do
I
> >know whether this may really apply to him or if I'm just looking
for
> >trouble. We've spent so much money already getting trainers to fly
in
> >and train our behavior techs in proper ABA techniques, MRI's, this
> >that and the other thing.
> >
> >I'm so very tired of rushing around like a chicken with it's head
> >cutoff. Everyone keeps saying their thing needs to be done before
a
> >certain age or before damage is so bad that it can't be reversed.
> >Then even when you decide you want to try something you got to
beat
> >your doctor, insurance agent, or disinterested pencil pusher over
the
> >head to implement it. Not to mention dragging the poor kid all
over
> >God's green earth, poking, prodding, probing, and pleading.
> >
> >Yet if I slow down for a second I'm afraid he will lose out on
> >something that may prove to be the ticket to his freedom from this
> >horrible nightmare!
> >
> >Somebody pinch me and wake me from this nightmare!! Sorry I know
I'm
> >whining but I could really use an A-men! :(