You do it because you decide to. I love a drink and am going out tonight. I do not worship alcohol and simply know when I have had enough. Last night, the night before, no drink and no problem. I do NOT want a life dfuelled by drink BUT I will not have a life without it and why should I.  Booze has taken me to many places some good but some horrible. I, we, have a choice at some point and that is everything. I have lived a part of my life without that ability to choose and I am not going back because I've decided not to. I am not at all being clever because my wisdom has come after tremendous pain.  Some people are able to control alcohol without having to go through this learning process. Good luck.

Cheers

davo

>From: Maria Martin <marymary069@...> >Reply-To: AlcoholicsCanDrinkSafelyAgain@yahoogroups.com >To: AlcoholicsCanDrinkSafelyAgain@yahoogroups.com >Subject: [AlcoholicsCanDrinkSafelyAgain] Need some advice >Date: Fri, 15 Apr 2005 07:54:23 -0700 (PDT) > > > >Dear Lilian and Murdoch (and anyone else who may read >this mail) > >I'm new to this little group and i haven't bought your >book yet, although i intend to. >I have had a drink problem for many years, it started >in my Early teens and I am now nearly 40. >I agree wholeheartedly with your idea that alcoholism >is a behavior problem with its roots in childhood >trauma, and that the real problem is not actually the >behavior itself, but the underlying issues. >I have tried AA and twelve-step re-hab and these have >been of absolutely no use to me whatsoever. I am now >in long-term psychotherapy, and although things have >got better they are still not perfect. >I have cut down my drinking from every day to once or >twice a week. But I still don't have full control over >it, and still drink on my own when i am sad or >stressed out. >what i would like to ask you, and anyone on this list >who has regained control over there drinking is HOW >you did it. Did you have a period of abstinence? and >how long did it take before you regained full control? >I've been struggling with this for two years and it's >still A daily battle. > >Any input would be a real help. > >Thanks >Maria > > > >--- lilianandmurdoch <LilianandMurdoch@...> wrote: > > > > > > > New book proves alcoholics can recover and drink > > responsibly again > > > > > > > > > > A new book "Phoenix in a Bottle", due to be > > published on 30 May, will > > prove that alcoholism is not a disease or illness, > > but a behavior > > problem rooted in childhood, which alcoholics can > > correct and be able > > to drink responsibly again if and when they so wish. > > > > > > click here to buy our book > > > > > > The authors are former alcoholics Lilian and Murdoch > > MacDonald, a > > married couple from Ayr, Ayrshire in Scotland. > > > > Lilian and Murdoch's lives were devastated by > > alcoholism, but they > > have now recovered so completely that they now not > > only lead normal > > lives again, but are also able to drink in a > > perfectly sociable > > manner once more. > > > > That goes against the teaching of Alcoholics > > Anonymous, and of many > > alcoholism treatment centres throughout the world. > > But Lilian (61) > > and Murdoch (58) believe that lifelong sobriety is > > not the solution > > to alcoholism, as this only treats the symptoms and > > not the causes of > > the problem, and is merely a damage limitation > > exercise. > > > > The couple argue that alcoholism, in common with > > other self-harming > > disorders like bulimia, anorexia and > > self-mutilation, often stems > > from problems experienced in childhood. And if these > > problems can be > > identified and properly addressed, then the problem > > behaviour can be > > cured. > > > > Ten years ago the couple had hit rock bottom, > > sleeping rough for two > > weeks on the streets of Cambridge, where a quarter > > of a century > > previously as an undergraduate Murdoch had received > > an honours degree > > in English Literature. They had moved to Cambridge > > from Ayr with the > > idea of Murdoch doing research for a doctorate, but > > had reverted to > > their old habits, started binge drinking, and been > > thrown out of > > their lodgings. > > > > After a fortnight, and when they were just about at > > the end of their > > tether, two nurses on their way home after a > > Saturday night out took > > pity on Lilian and Murdoch, bought them a cup of tea > > and found them a > > place in a homeless hostel. > > > > They spent the next twelve months there getting to > > the roots of their > > alcoholism. They tried AA one last time, before > > concluding that it > > was a quasi-religious cult whose ideas on alcoholism > > were inadequate > > and outdated. > > > > Instead, by reading psychology, they decided that > > the causes of their > > alcoholic behaviour lay in problems experienced > > during childhood. And > > that once these problems were realised and > > addressed, there was no > > longer any need for escape through alcoholism, and > > they could even > > drink normally like other people again. > > > > Ten years after selling newspapers from a stand in > > Market Square, > > Cambridge, so that he and Lilian could get back on > > their feet > > financially, Murdoch now writes business and > > financial articles for > > three local weekly papers and also runs his own > > public relations > > consultancy. > > > > And Lilian is so keen to pass on the benefits of > > their experience to > > others who still have problems with alcohol, that > > together the couple > > wrote "Phoenix in a Bottle". > > > > Eminent American addiction expert Dr Stanton Peele > > PhD has read the > > book, and commented: > > > > "Phoenix in a Bottle is a modern version of The Days > > of Wine and > > Roses, and tells the true story of how two people > > who entered a > > period of desperate drinking stayed with one another > > in a close > > loving relationship, and emerged from their > > alcoholism able to drink > > responsibly again. > > > > "Both a wonderful love story and a challenge to > > conventional wisdom > > about how people can recover from drinking problems, > > Phoenix in a > > Bottle gives people hope, and helps them to confront > > their own > > demons - alcohol or otherwise." > > > > "Phoenix in a Bottle" by Lilian and Murdoch > > MacDonald will be > > published by Melrose Books price £16.99 on 30 May. > > > > > > > > click here to buy our book > > > > Enquiries: > > > > Ross Hilton > > Commissioning Editor > > Melrose Books > > St Thomas Place > > ELY > > Cambridgeshire > > CB7 4GG > > Telephone: 00 44 1353 646608 > > E-mail: rosshilton@... > > > > Web: www.melrosebooks.com > > > > Issued by Fame Publicity Services. > > > > Fame Publicity Services > > 10 Miller Road > > AYR, Ayrshire > > Scotland KA7 2AY > > Tel.: 00 44 1292 281498 > > Mobile: 07833 667322. > > E-mail: famepublicity@... > > > > Web: www.famepublicity.co.uk > > > > Lilian and Murdoch's website: > > www.alcoholicscandrinksafelyagain.com > > > > Melrose Books website: > > www.melrosebooks.com > > > > Dr Stanton Peele's website: > > www.peele.net > > > > > > > > > > Web links: > > > > http://i-newswire.com/pr8494.html > > > > http://www.24-7pressrelease.com/view_release.php? > > rID=3788&tf7sid=ce8a547a08c7011ff861cc4134c30ef1 > > > > http://www.theopenpress.com/index.php?a=press&id=799 > > > > >http://www.alcoholicscandrinksafelyagain.com/newpage5.html > > > > http://www.pressbox.co.uk/Detailed/24330.html > > > > http://www.prweb.com/releases/2005/2/prweb213026.htm > > > > >http://www.emediawire.com/releases/2005/2/prweb213026.htm > > > > >http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/AlcoholicsCanDrinkSafelyAgain/mes > > sage/23 > > > > > > > > > > > > >=== message truncated === > > > Maria Martin > > > > > > >__________________________________ >Do you Yahoo!? >Yahoo! Small Business - Try our new resources site! >http://smallbusiness.yahoo.com/resources/ > > > > > >------------------------ Yahoo! Groups Sponsor --------------------~--> >Ever feel sad or cry for no reason at all? >Depression. Narrated by Kate Hudson. >http://us.click.yahoo.com/1visLB/esnJAA/xGEGAA/WySolB/TM >--------------------------------------------------------------------~-> > > >Yahoo! Groups Links > ><*> To visit your group on the web, go to: > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AlcoholicsCanDrinkSafelyAgain/ > ><*> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to: > AlcoholicsCanDrinkSafelyAgain-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com > ><*> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to: > http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/ > > > >