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The ADD / ADHD Gazette
The FREE online ezine all about ADD and ADHD.
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*** ISSUE #21 ***
27th November 1999

IN THIS ISSUE:
NEWS AND VIEWS
ARTICLE: Parents Of Special Needs Kids - Avoid Burnout
RESOURCES


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NEWS AND VIEWS

There is a relatively new list where parents can discuss the 'what
to do' and 'how to' issues of raising an ADHD child, with the accent
on hyperactive children. An on line support group for exchanging
information, helping one another or venting. Other issues to discuss
are problems with IEP's, medications, and ignorance of ADHD.
Welcoming professionals as well as parents ADHD Kids has it's
our own CHAT room too and urges you to invite others anytime
you wish. For more information - ADHDkids-owner@onelist.com
To subscribe - ADHDkids-subscribe@onelist.com

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For anyone who'se interested. I have been sent a number of copies
of my book, Wild Child, from the publisher to sell direct if any one
would like to buy one. All copies will therefore be signed :-))
and the price is £6.95 plus 80 pence P & P.

If you are in The States or any other country, and would still like
to order a copy you can alternatively get it online at
http://www.Amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/1872229247/gailmiller

Dr Christopher Green (author of Understanding ADHD and
Toddler Taming - the no 1 bestseller in WH Smiths Childcare titles
this week) says "Gail gives a technicolour description of her
confusion and pain, as she came up against a stone wall of
professionals. Followed by a moving account of the breakthrough."

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"Dear Gail,
I am a fourth year psychology student at the University of Kent,
and this year I am hoping to do some research into the stress of
parenting a child with ADHD. Having worked with several families
last year in Norwich, I know the strain this disorder can put on them,
but would like to understand more. I need to get in touch with as
many parents as possible who have a child with ADHD. I wondered
whether you could help with distributing a questionnaire. Thanks."

This lady will do her survey via email, therefore could anyone in
the UK who would be willing to partake in the survey please email
Wendy at wcf1@... who will forward the questionaire.

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Has anyone any experience with Aromatherapy and ADHD? I am
trying to find information on whether this therapy might help George.
Apparently there are many therapeutic benefits of essential oils but
so far I have not been able to find any information specifically
regarding ADHD being helped with Aromatherapy. If anyone has
any info or can point me in the direction or articles etc I would be
grateful. Gail - theadhdgazette@...

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For readers in the UK, I have heard about some new legislation
which might be coming in which could have a massive impact on
our kids. Apparently the Govt. wants to reduce the number of
temporary and permanent school exclusions and A HUGE sum of
money is being allocated for this. It is to be used to improve
attendance and reduce exclusions.

If these criteria are not met, part of the money will have to be paid
back, therefore, effectively schools will be "punished" for failing to
deal with the problem. Possibly this money might be available by
April next year but the initiative has to be in place for September.

This is all very tentative at present and it is just a whisper I hear,
but it sounds good to me! I would be interested to know though
what schools can actually *do* when behaviours are so bad that
they warrant exclusions? When everything else they have tried
fails? I wonder if the Govt bring along some strategies along with
the dollop of cash?


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ARTICLE

Parents Of Special Needs Kids - Avoid Burnout
by Gail Miller

Parents of Special Needs children often find themselves trying to
burn the candle at both ends. It seems the stresses and strains we
endure on a daily basis go far and beyond what we would believe
ourselves able to cope with. But cope we do. Year in, year out –
often with little support injected from any outside agencies.

At one of our recent visits to our son’s clinical psychologist, I
was informed that if I were in a paid profession I would probably
be able to sue for ‘burnout’. It was at the end of the summer holiday
which ran for 7 weeks (bar two days) this year and by this time it
was easily apparent that I was at ‘the end of my rope’. As we have
battled for years with our Social Services department to get respite
care during the holidays and got nowhere, it is not difficult to see
why I often feel like an elastic band which has been stretched
beyond breaking point!

So how do we avoid ‘burnout’? Well, there are a number of
suggestions which help A LITTLE. However, I would not even
venture to suggest that the high levels of stress we have to work
through can be alleviated with one or two adjustments – they can’t,
but here are some tips which just MIGHT help over-stressed parents.

If there doesn’t seem to be enough hours in the day, let your
standards drop a little. So what if your house doesn’t look like a show
home – no matter. Take at least half an hour to an hour for yourself
every day. Have a coffee and read a magazine, take a scented
bath, paint your finger and toe nails.

Throw it away. List everything that is worrying you on a piece of paper,
from problems at work to relationship worries. When you have finished,
chop the paper into little pieces and throw it in the bin.

Don’t attempt to be superman or woman. Learn to accept that you can’t
do everything at once. It’s no good being the most perfect person in the
graveyard is it! Sometimes things just have to be put aside until you have
the time to get round to them. Learn to try to close your mind to
certain things.

Join on-line support groups. It is amazing, how much strength you get
from being able to ‘speak’ to others in a similar situation to yourself who
you can gain support from and give support to. There are hundreds of
mailing lists, newsgroups, clubs and message boards where you will find
friends who know exactly what you are going through.

Try getting to an exercise class once a week. Aerobics, line dancing,
step or any other group. All will give you a much needed energy, not to
mention confidence boost. Not only this but you will enjoy the social
aspect too.

Treat yourself occasionally. It could only be a lipstick or a new set of
undies, a new gardening tool or a CD record, but get yourself
something which makes you feel special and a person in your own right
– not just someone’s Mum or Dad.

Organise yourself. If you feel you have 1,001 things to do every day
apart from the usual round of school or medical appointments we often
have, getting the child (ren) ready and off to school, possibly going out
to work too, try to prioritise your tasks. Make a list of everything you
have to do, starting with the most important and work down to the least
important ones. Tick off each job as it is completed. Even if you don’t
manage to get through the whole list, by prioritising, you will at least
know that you have completed your most important tasks.

Possibly sometimes easier said than done, but just try to cut down on
fatty and sugary food, takeaways and processed ready meals. Eat more
fresh fruit and vegetables, and cut down on caffeine and alcohol intake.
Check food labels and watch those additives, such as colourings, salt,
preservatives, and artificial flavours.

Fill your house with your favourite type of music. Even if you only have
chance to listen while doing the dusting, play tracks which evoke joyful
memories for you. ~ Good luck


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RESOURCES

Around the world in twelve songs with Boowa and Kwala.
Check out two new fun sites where kids can play and learn.
Interactive coloring games for small children (and their older siblings)
are available at http://www.coloringpage.org. A selection of original
and fun games is available at http://www.kidsgames.org - the kids
will have something to do on those long, cold winter evenings...
These sites will be updated with new games and activities every
month that will be based on Boowa and Kwala, Transylvanian
Petshop and many other fun cartoon characters we all know & love.

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A lawyer is on his death bed and a friend visits him and sees him
madly flipping thorough the bible. The friend asked the lawyer
what he was doing and the lawyer replied "Looking for a loophole!"
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IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER
Items herein are published for education/information purposes
only. Any therapy, product, service, or featured web site mentioned
does NOT imply endorsement by The Gazette. Accuracy and
content of any web sites featured cannot be guaranteed. Views
and statements written by contributors are not necessarily the
views of The ADD / ADHD Gazette.

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LINKS
If you have a website and are looking for links. I am happy to add
a reciprocal link to The ADHD (UK) Website. Take a look at my
site http://home.freeuk.net/theadhdgazette and email me to swap links

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SEE YA NEXT TIME ~ Gail Miller 1999
theadhdgazette@...

And remember ..........
"If your not making waves than you ain't kicking