Welcome.  I so relate.  I was a young adult and our family doctor (a very old man at this time) misdiagnosed a condition and treated my lack of periods with DES.  I was actually pregnant.  As you know, DES causes severe birth defects.  

Since this time, I am absolutely panicky about going to the doctor.  I'm also afraid of dying which might happen if I don't go to the doctor and get normal check ups.  I feel certain that if I have tests done, some hidden, terminal disease will be diagnosed and by the sheer act of going to the doctor, I have ended my own life.

Logically, makes no sense at all.  I work with my therapist on this to no avail.  I have taken the step of making an appointment with a new doctor on February 2nd.  I told the staff that this would just be a sit down (no exam room) in her office for a consultation.  At this time, I hopefully will be able to sensibly describe my fears and I am praying that some sort of compassionate bond will be met and I will be able to schedule an actual check up.

I know that I can do this on some level.  For instance, I have the most wonderful veterinarian for my pets.  I swear, if he was liscenced to do so, I would few fears of him being my doctor.  I am trying to explore this further.

Thanks for sharing Wendy Lou.

Cheryl

From: "wendylou666" <wpacheco@...>
Reply-To: 000-Fear-Of-Doctors@yahoogroups.com
Date: Mon, 05 Jan 2004 15:46:00 -0000
To: 000-Fear-Of-Doctors@yahoogroups.com
Subject: [000-Fear-Of-Doctors] New Member Thanks to Daniel

I agree with all the things Daniel said in his post: Fear Of
Doctor=Fear Of Unknown and Fear Of Mortality.

As a child, I had kidney surgeries during a time when
child-centered medicine meant keeping the brat quiet and
compliant. I have been daignosed wih posttraumatic stress
disorder based on what happened. Sounds like a nice, tidy
diagnosis, but it means that I have an extreme fear of going to
the doctor, having any test, and all associated medical things.

I do not fear pain or procedures. I fear, once again, having a life
dominated by doctors, hospitals, and treatments. I have a fear
that I will not be able to continue working at my current level and
supporting my family.

I have been to the doctor highly drugged by a psychiatrist, but my
fear is so strong that it was as though I had swallowed a bunch
of Cheerios. I'm feeling frustrated, sad, silly, immature, and out
of control. Thanks for listening.





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