Cathy,  I was new to this group several months ago and never got a response to my fears.  I don't believe there is anyone in this group who reads the emails.  My fear is also of doctors and hospitals because of lack of trust and also I cannot stand the thought of  anything going on inside of me.

Your fear is a new one to me, but I can definitely understand it.  There is no reason to be ashamed of your fears, there are so many people who have fears similar to ours but they don't seem to admit to them.  I began taking Sam-E to help with my apprehension and fears.  If you are not familiar with it, it is an over the counter pill that helps with anxiety and depression.  However, if you are taking any prescription medication, you need to clear it with your dr. because some of these over the counter drugs can react adversely to other drugs.

I really don't know the answer to these problems.  I still refuse to go to any doctors except for emergencies and I am 61.  I am afraid of any tests which may allow me to hear the sounds inside  my body.  (you thought you were weird didn't you?)  I also have a phobia against blood tests, not the needle, but the actual removal of blood.  Just the thought of it going through the veins and into the needle drives me insane.  Just writing this will put me in a fix for awhile.  I have named my phobia the "Dracula Syndrome".

Have you talked to your dr. about your fears?  From my past experiences of operations (over 30 years ago), the only thing that made me nauseaous was the anesthesia and I understand that times have changed and what they use now is less abusive to your system.  Try and convince yourself of the true facts:  that they removal of the fibroid cysts is a much lesser evil than your fears.  Even I think I could convince myself to go with the lesser evil.  If you continue on without the surgery, it will only get worse and then you may very well end up experiencing your fears.  If you do it now, your fears may be just that; fears.  Just think how great you will feel to get rid of those awful things inside of you and conquer your fears at the same time.

Keep  "us?" me posted on what is going on with you.  Maybe if a coupla of us post to this list, others will do it as well.

Good luck and well wishes, Marie Bennett