hi there.

My name's Caroline and for nearly as long as I can remember, I've
been scared of the dentist.

Ok, not just scared, plain terrified. It got really bad this year,
but I'm getting ahead of myself a little.

I had managed to avoid the dentist for a good many years, until I
was left with no other choice. I went and was lucky enough to meet
a very friendly and sympathetic dentist.

Problem was, she left the practise and I was passed on. The first
one was useless. Told me I was imagining pain as she drilled. She
told me to keep quiet as I was disturbing the patients with my cries
of pain. Well, I lost a lot of confidence and I didn't go back until
I again, had no other choice. It ended in tears. She wouldn't take
the needle out of my mouth when I got stressed and I paniced and
pushed her away. I can understand why she wouldn't be happy, but
yelling at me wasn't the way to go about letting me know.

So I didn't go back. Until I had to.

I got more work done, but because I'd left it, it got worse.

Now, my biggest fear isn't the dentist, it's injections. I don't
think I could describe just how terrified I am of them. Up until
this point I was able to cope with them at the dentist. (not that I
was any great shakes getting the actual work done, I'd squeeze my
eyes closed and rip to shred a tissue in my hands. Afterwards I'd
be shaking like a leaf) But the
time before last, I needed three for three teeth in a row on the
bottom. I just wanted the hell away and she (my dentist, a
different lady this time thank god)knew it. She told me she was
only going to do two teeth, but worked fast and did all three.

I really thought that was the end of it. (I hope you don't mind me
giving you the full lenght version lol) Then my last check up
showed I needed two small fillings and when I complained of pain she
checked and saw that she had left decay in one of the three teeth.

I just knew I couldn't go through three painful injections again. It
has always seemed like I needed at least three for work on bottom
teeth. So we tried valum, or diazapam or whatever it's called lol.
20mgs didn't work. I simply refused to open my mouth and cried.
And I just lost my nerve completely for the next appointment with
30mgs *sigh*

To make matters worse, I'd been forced to have a blood test and it
made me a little crazy. The thought of another injection just
depressed me. I had about 4 or 5 panic attacks just thinking of the
dentist. I had one in the reception area and I was only going in to
pay the bill.

Then a bit of my tooth fell off. So, I decided to try Twilight
Sleep. My Doctor gave me a cream that numbed the injection site,
and it worked a little, but I couldn't help panicing and stressing
out as they give it. I cry a lot it seems at the dentist lol.

I can't recommend it enough, though. I was awake and aware to a
certain degree, but I don't remember having those injections at
all. I was told later on that I laughed the whole way through it
and I know why. Because I was so amazed that I had actually gone
through with it.

I've been told that one of the top back teeth might need a root
canal if it doesn't settle down. So, at the moment I'm just
ignoring the very little amount of pain it gives me when I bite down
on a certain point of the tooth. It wasn't that long ago I got the
work done and she's happy to wait 6 months to see if it eases up
any. I am a little annoyed that she simply wants to pull it, mainly
because it would be easier for her. Well, I had the wisdom tooth
beside it pulled years ago, and that would leave me a gap I wouldn't
feel comfortable with. Not to mention that she's suggested it for
another tooth in a similar condition (although it doesn't give me
any real pain).

And that's my story. I hope you don't mind it being so long, but I
really like the idea of this group. My family don't really
understand this fear I have, as they all can go to the dentist
without a worry. I know how depressing it can feel being afraid of
the dentist. For now, my teeth are decay free. I use a high fluride
toothpaste prescribed by my dentist.

Nice to meet you all.

Caroline